Repetition

I’ve spent just about the last year at the RADLab working in a project management capacity… Or at least attempting to. Not only have I been trying to improve my skill base as I go but I’ve started taking an Applied Project Management certificate course through work. It’s a long program and will take me the better part of a year to get through it all but I believe it will be worth it in the long run.

Ah yes, the long run. What is that, exactly? Or, more accurately, WHEN is that? I’ve already spent a good part of my life doing nothing and when I finally get off my ass and select something I wanted to do with my life, I get shuffled off into an area I really didn’t have much interest in. I think this is the point where I digress….

Sly often says that she thinks I’ll never be truly happy; that I’ll move through life always thinking that it should be better. That I should be making more money, getting more time off or receiving more perks from my work. She’s right but I don’t apologize for that.

Is it not the true meaning of ambition to want better for yourself and the people you love? Yes, perhaps my childhood has caused an echo into the present that causes me to make sure Sly and I don’t have to struggle as much as my Mom did. I want Sly to have the things that she desires without being fearful that acquiring them would cause us financial hardship. Or set us back too terribly far.

Which gets me back to the reason of this post: repetition. How many times do I need to feel the same thing over again before I do something to either change my circumstances or change my mind? Which is easier?  Which would lead to a more fulfilling existence?  My work feels really tough and that’s mostly because it challenges me. There’s never been a time in the past when I liked to ‘coast’, sometimes going so far as to create challenges within the work space I’m in if it gets too easy or requesting more responsibility.

Facebook is the place where people go to humble-brag about their lives (whether that’s posting pictures of some amazing trip they are taking or posting pictures of their spawn) but it also sometimes inspires me. So many memes being posted, so many inspirational posters of cats with the caption “Hang in There!” that I just want to barf until I realize one thing: I’m not the only person out there disheartened, disillusioned, disenfranchised (That last one might be untrue but I’m not positive yet) by his/her life in its current state.

Everyone wants a better life but only a few realize that change is a necessity if you wish to continue moving forward in your life; if you choose it; if you welcome it.  Change can be scary and it can be the most liberating thing you’ll ever experience but you have to embrace it. Embrace the change you want to be.

So that’s what I’m going to do: I’m going to embrace the change that’s occurring in my life and enjoy the ride while making slight corrections to my direction. I think it’s for the best, mentally and physically.

We’ll see.